I have many, many blogs. I’ve been blogging since 2002, so that’s about 8 years of personal opinion floating around the interwebs for people to read, laugh, or choose to get offended by.

In one of my old and now defunct blogs, I had written a post about the names Tony and I were planning at the time for Fictitious Offspring. (This is going back about 2+ years, mind you.) Had another read today, and it’s actually still relevant although I’m not sure what names we had in mind at the time.


It’s a delicate process of elimination. We figured we could whittle down the names list just by laying down some business rules.

Business rules thus far:

  • No names of former lovers.
  • No names of family members, dead or alive. (We’re just not that kind of couple)
  • No names of babies belonging to friends, church-mates or colleagues past and present
  • No biblical names, unless they’re really unusual, are easily pronounceable, and don’t belong to wayward Israelites or heathens. (Why give them that kind of pressure?)
  • No names of associates who have given us grief. (Includes narky sales personnel and crazy playground nemeses)
  • No common names. (No Tom, Dick, Harry, Jane, Spot)
  • No names of existing children who have turned us off the concept of procreation after being in their charming company for upward of 15 minutes.

So far, it’s been working a charm. We have one short listed for boys’ names, and about three for girls. Tony keeps wondering why they’re mostly Irish names, since neither of us is Irish.

It’s a slight concern, but adding “Anglo-Germanic or Sino origins” to the business rules just makes things impossible.